BOEING SELLING ALL PRODUCTION ASSETS; WILL CONCENTRATE ON MILITARY KICKBACKS

8.6 EARTHQUAKE DECIMATES BAFFIN ISLAND - QUONSET HUT UNDAMAGED, OWNERS BOUNCED AROUND A BIT ON TUNDRA

UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN ASTROPHYSICS PAPER SUGGESTS THAT TIME KEEPS ON SLIPPIN', SLIPPIN', SLIPPIN' INTO THE FUTURE

In 20/20 Interview, Diane Sawyer Goads Keith Richards into Showing off His Original Mammoth-Skin Guitar

Adorable Kittens to Sit Out Washington State Caucuses

Courtney Love Re-Enters Rehab After Attending Ballet Featuring Dance of the Heroin-Plum Fairies, Normally Not Performed in Reality

Portland Strip Club Reperatory Theater Putting On Production of King Leer

Kinshasa: Real Estate Developer Turns Masai Hut Village Condo, Offering Units in the Low 80 Cows

32 New Hampshire Voters Playing Star Trek Vodka Drinking Game Tonight to Decide Fate of Planet Tomorrow

Rise in Hiring of Ghost Employees Boost for Pretend Economy

Coven Interview at Eugene Restaraunt Goes South When Desirable Number of Cats Underestimated

Qwest Service Truck Never, Ever Serviced

Alaskan Woman Attempts to Pass Off Frosted Hair as Expensive Salon Treatment

SEATTLE BUSINESS MOGUL TO CRUSH ENEMIES FIRMLY BUT POLITELY

LUNCHMEAT STRONGLY QUESTIONED