Monday, July 19, 2004

Administation Takes Pains to Clarify That Economic Gains From Enslavement of 2nd Graders Will Benefit All American Families Without 2nd Graders

Detailed Story of Web Server Replacement Kills 2, Injures 14

Woman in Elephant Costume Gains Popularity With Clever Use of Shop Vac

CANADA RETRACTS PROTOPLASMIC PSEUDOPOD

Highly Attractive Manhattan Woman Breaks Cross-Town Land Speed Record


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Baptists Bag 400 African Souls with 800 Pounds of Rice

Adorable Kittens Cop a Feel

Coming Up on Headlines: Our Expert Tells You Everything You Want to Believe