WOOKIE AMBASSADOR TO EARTH EXPRESSES DISAPPOINTMENT IN TONY BLAIR
TEST OF INTERNET VOTING ELEVATES EMINEM TO 4TH PLACE IN MICHIGAN CAUCUSES
MARS ROVER DRILLS INTO MARS SURFACE- STRIKES NOUGAT
IN TEARY NBC INTERVIEW, BUSH ADMITS LIFE-LONG SHAME OF SPEAKING ONLY PIDGIN ENGLISH
FIRE-FIGHT IN SUNNI TRIANGLE AS FIJIAN DIVISION LAUNCHES OPERATION 'FURIOUS CORAL'
Los Angeles Hospital Competition Heats Up with Catastrophic Heart Failure ER Discount Coupons
University of Michigan Study IDs "Hot-Chick Hit-On Scenario Bio-Software" in Constant Male Operation
A Particularly Wily Coyote Suing Warner Bros. For Image Copyright Infringement, Cruel Defamation
ADORABLE KITTENS WATCHING TOO MUCH AQUARIUM
University of Robots Ethics Course Incorporating Star Trek Episode Re Issue of Whether To Explode as Reaction to Logical Conundrums
Collective Gasp of 93 Million People In Jasckon Nipple Flap Recorded for Use in Anti-Riot Trucks
University of Robots Endowment Drive Targeting ATM Machine Alums
Howard Dean Mounts Gnarly Chopper on Ride into the West
Dennis Miller Breaks Snideometer
Aritificially Intelligent Anti-Ballistic Missile System will Launch From Alaska, Land Near Pyongyang Palace and Instigate Tricky Disarmament Negotiations with Kim Jong Il
PACIFIC PUDDING SHARK HAS SPOON-SHARP TEETH
Manageable Goals Revolutionaries Boycotting Halliburton In Any Potential Drilling Muds Contract
University of Michigan Poll Indicates 12% of Americans Just Driving Around Because They Don't Want to Go Home Right Away