IN ACCORDANCE WITH SECRET PLAN, HOLLYWOOD OSCAR NIGHT GALA DESTROYS FAMILY, CAPITALISM
Michael Eisner Knifed in Alley by Giant Rodent
Peter Jackson Very Nearly Buttons Collar
University Computer Lab Users Indistinguishable in Behavior From Canned Green Peas Inspectors
Robot Receptionist Held Back From Promotion Due to Blow Job Disability
Gregarious Paris Shares Nefarious Ferret
Adorable Kittens Get Paper Cups Stuck on Head
Eskimo Pies Splattered as Explosion in Gaza Strip Caused By Ice Cream Truck Compressor Malfunction
George W. Bush Urged Not to Drive Car With Ass Muscles
Even in Librarian Glasses, Liv Tyler One Sexy Fucking Elf
For Committed Delegates, John Edwards Offering to Knock $1500 off New Kias
University of Michigan Study: Strong Correlation Between Movie Quality and Geographical Distance from Los Angeles